Change of Address Or Fic for Andrea
by TempestJo
Summary: When Sheldon moves out, life changes. Rated T for now. *changed to slight M for chapter 12 and chapter 17
1. Chapter 1

The day Sheldon moved out, the building almost seemed to be in shock. The fourth floor was no longer pervasive with the smell of stinky markers, and there was not a computer generated explosion to be heard.

Three days later, Penny had had enough.

With the help of her phone, (cause there's an app for that!) Penny had located his new residence, a small house only a block away from the university. He had invited them over for Saturday night, but she couldn't wait that long. She missed him, the sound of his voice.

She parked in front of his house, and got out of the car slowly. This house was not new, it was older, quaint. It didn't seem like the sort of place Sheldon would live, except that someone had weeded the front garden with a ruthless sense of order.

A sign on the door read 'doorbell disabled'. She was about to knock when she heard a funny sound from the backyard, and went around the side of the house to investigate.

The backyard was in chaos. Half of it was immaculate, orderly, and layed out to perfection. The other half was a mess of scraggly weeds and long grass. In the middle, with his back to her, and a weedeater in his hands, stood Sheldon.

She'd never seen him with less than two shirts on. Her he was with no shirt at all. His pants were hanging faintly baggy at the hips, with all those shirts she'd never noticed before.

He moved the weed eater with ease, the muscles on his back moving under his skin in a perfectly synchronized rhythm, back and forth, back and forth.

He was making real headway with this lawn.

He would probably never have left the apartment building if his grandma hadn't died and left him money. He loathed the idea of putting it in a bank, so he had decided to invest in real estate. This little old house had fit the bill perfectly, being both in the price range and in the neighbourhood Sheldon wanted. He could walk to work from here.

The smell of the freshly cut grass and the sight of a small trickle of sweat daring to slide down Sheldon's back between his shoulder blades had her licking her lips.

She'd never seen him look so untidy.

His hair was messed, his fingers were caked with dirt. He looked like the Texas farm boy he had once been, and boy was she liking it.

Resolutely, she strode into the backyard, picking up a weeding rake on her way.

"Hi Sheldon!" She chirped.

He spun around with a frown. "What are you doing here? It's not Saturday!"

She smiled and waved the rake at him. "I'm here to help. That's what friends do."

"Oh." He shifted. "What else do friends do when one moves into a house?"

"After the yardwork is done, they share a pizza." Penny grinned wider.

"They deliver here." He replied, intrigued. "Very well. You may start over there." He pointed to a section of garden.

As Penny worked, she kept her back to the fence so she could watch him. He was attacking the lawn the same way he attacked everything else, thoroughly. She was so intent on watching him that she nearly pulled out a tulip when he paused to take a drink from the hose.

Feeling the heat all of a sudden, she pulled off her long sleeved shirt, thankful she was wearing a tank top underneath. She missed the look he gave her and the slight widening of his eyes before they turned back to the task at hand.

At last, the yard was done.

Penny collapsed onto the deck fanning herself. "It's hot."

He cleared his throat and darted in the house, coming back seconds later with two cans of pop from the fridge.

"Aw thanks!" She pressed the can to her forehead and cleavage before popping the top and taking a long drink. "Ugh, that is better." Looking around, she nodded her approval. "It's looking really good now Sheldon."

He was flushed, and his nod was short. "Yes. Thank you for your help Penny. Should I order the pizza now? I require a shower, but there should be time.."

"Sure!" She jumped up onto her feet. "You have a shower, and I'll order the pizza. I'm dying to see the inside of this place." She was flirting with him, and she knew it.

He merely nodded and held open the back door for her.

The inside was as immaculate as the outside, though things were a little dated, and there were some scuffs on the lino floor that she knew must be driving him nuts.

"Aw, how nice." She ran her hand over the kitchen counter, admiring the room they were in.

He pointed out the phone and then disappeared up the stairs. Soon she could hear the shower running. An image of soapy suds cascading down his back and arms flew into her mind and her fingers tightened on the counter.

She had actually been able to smell him as he walked by. Normally sweat didn't turn her on, but Sheldon never sweated. Ever. The slightest hint that he was a man had her shaking in her knees.

Resolutely she pushed the thought out of her mind and ordered a pizza for the two of them. Then she started exploring, careful not to touch anything with her dirty clothes and dusty hands. The main floor held the kitchen, a half bath, a living room, an office, and a laundry room.

Sheldon had his own laundry room! She lingered there for a minute, breathing in the scent of his laundry detergent, and a faint whiff of bleach. Already this house was bending itself to suit him.

She knew that it wouldn't take much for her to be bending equally easily.


	2. Chapter 2

ch2

When he came down the stairs, he found her back in the kitchen making tea. From her elbows to her fingertips she was scrubbed clean, but the rest of her was in disarray. Her shorts had smudges of dirt from where she had wiped her hands on them earlier in the afternoon, and her tank top was sagging slightly.

A true farm girl, she had worked hard at the task she had set herself to, and he had to admit that the job had been more enjoyable with her company, though they hadn't verbally said much. As she turned to face him he saw a tiny smudge of dirt on one cheek and felt guilty.

"Would you like to take a shower?" He offered awkwardly.

Her smile lit up the room in response.

He led the way back up the stairs, cautioning her on the tricks of the facet and the tendency of the hot to kick in late, then fetched her his Tuesday pajamas to wear while he cleaned her own clothing. Now that he had his own personal laundry room, he felt he could be magnanimous.

She was suitably impressed by his offer of the clothes and took them into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

A brief thought that the bathrooms teal and white colour scheme suited her had him scurrying back down the stairs to await the pizza.

~P~

His bathroom was cute. All white, with blue tile accents, it was more sanitary than the kitchen at work without a doubt. Even his tub stickies were blue.

With a sigh of relief, she stripped out of her sweaty clothes and dropped them on the floor. She didn't know if she looked that bad or if he was just being a good host, but she was thrilled that he had actually offered her some clothes to wear. His pajamas no less! They would probably be too tight and too long, but oh well! It was like a slumber party! Pajamas and pizza, and maybe a show on tv. The perfect end to a day.

She turned on the shower and waited a few minutes like he had advised, then got in and began washing her hair. He still used the same old shampoo. The sight of it made her smile, and she was secretly relieved at the proof that although his surroundings had changed, and he had acquired a bit of a tan, he was still the same Sheldon.

Which meant she had better hurry up if she wanted a chance to veto the channel selection.

Quickly finishing up, she jumped out of the shower and dried off. His pajama pants actually didn't fit too bad, if she rolled them up at the ankles, but the top was like a nightie, so she pulled an old cheerleader trick and tied the front into a knot. After giving her hair a shake, she grabbed her dirty clothes and hung up the towel and headed downstairs.

~S~

He had just opened the pizza box when she thundered down the stairs and disappeared into the laundry room. Having already set up the washing machine for her, he knew it would be mere seconds before she was back, so he put some pizza on a plate for her.

It was odd seeing someone else in his pajamas. Even odder that they had somehow been altered, and now looked very feminine.

After years of having a room mate, living alone had been a bit of an adjustment so far. The house seemed more alive now that Penny was there. More homey.

To quell his thoughts, he lifted up his pizza and shoved some in his mouth. He was being ridiculous.


	3. Chapter 3

Ch3

They were quiet as they ate, sitting across from each other at the small round table. His apartment had not had enough room for a table what with all the desks and electronics, but here in his little kitchen, he did. The silence was not oppressive, though Penny could clearly hear the clock ticking on the wall above the fridge.

It was nice. Simple. Her in his pj's, him still with damp hair, both of them devouring the pizza with the appetite of those who spent the afternoon labouring outdoors.

In truth, Penny hadn't had a meal so comfortable and satisfying in years.

When the last piece of pizza was gone, he carried the plates to the sink and washed them while she instinctively folded the pizza box and put it into the recycling box that was lurking in the laundry room, then switched her clothing to the drier.

"It must be nice having your own washer and drier." She commented as she came back into the kitchen.

His smile was infectious. "I am considering putting up a small line in the backyard to hang linens on."

"Perfect!" Penny replied with a smile of her own. She could see it perfectly in her head, Sheldon with a basket of sheets and blankets, carefully attaching each item to the line, exactly six inches from the last, and then sitting and watching the sheets blowing in the wind to make sure no birds flew overhead or landed on the line.

He would of course be playing Conan or something similar on his laptop, his long fingers pecking away at the keys frantically, occasionally accompanied by an evil sorcerer's laugh which would no doubt terrify the neighbourhood children or seniors.

But on the other hand, she could also see him sitting side by side with doing battle with either, both of them with laptops sitting atop bony knees, jabbing each other with their elbows.

Her own grandma was getting scarily good at Conan, some to think of it.

She laughed quietly to herself, shaking her head at his confused look. "I was just thinking my grandma would approve of this house." She explained.

"Oh." He looked around, then nodded. "As would mine." His fingers twitched briefly. "Would you care to watch a movie?"

~S~

The couch had been the first thing he purchased after the house. Leonard had opposed him taking the brown one from the apartment, claimed he had found it, it was his. His outrage had lasted until he entered the furniture store and spotted the couch of his dreams. It fit him perfectly, being slightly higher and slightly deeper than most. A couch for tall people.

It helped that it was a nice navy blue leather, and that it had instantly fitted itself to his derriere.

Now though, as he was sitting in his new spot, he was forced to realize something else. While it had the amusing effect of making Leonard and Howard look like Munchkins from the Wizard of Oz, it made Penny look surprisingly seductive.

She'd laughed with delight when she had realized her feet did not touch the floor, and then tucked them up beside her, so that she appeared to be curled towards him. She looked relaxed, and happy, and as she turned her eyes to his with an impish grin, remarking on how she felt like a little girl again, he had to force himself to not say that she certainly didn't look one, with her voluptuous curves.


	4. Chapter 4

Ch4

Halfway through the movie, Penny, full of pizza and tea and sunshine, fell asleep.

This was not unusual in his old apartment, when the films often bored her or she was half inebriated, but this was her favourite movie. One moment she had been smiling softly, cuddling up to the throw pillow in her lap, and then next, her eyelids were closed and her head was softly sliding down the back of the couch to rest on his shoulder.

He knew, because he had spent most of the movie watching _her_, trying to figure out what was different about today. Why her being in his home, in his pajamas, was effecting him more than the sight of her in her underwear and a discarded shirt ever had. It finally occurred to him. _His._ Before, at the apartment, he had never known whom she was trying to visit when she waltzed through the door in a cloud of cheesecake scented air.

But this was his house. Only he lived there. She had, therefore, come specifically to see him. She had not brought a frozen laptop or a game query which would relegate her visit as a necessity. She had no reason to show up except that she wanted his company.

It was a very odd sensation. Often people wanted his knowledge, or his skill, and charities often wanted his money, but his company was something people just seemed to put up with. Not that he cared, he was only putting up with their presence as well, but Penny's willingness to chip in this afternoon instead of distract him with banal chat was mesmerizing. She'd never been able to help him accomplish something before. And they had done a wonderful job. The backyard now met his expectations. His yard. His house. His company. His couch.

_His pajamas._

His friend. For the first time since the day he had met her, even before that if the truth be told, Sheldon wondered if a girl like her would ever want to settle down with a guy like him.

She sighed and snuggled in closer to him, her hand coming up to rest under her chin on his chest, and though he didn't move a muscle, he also didn't feel the need or desire to move away.

~P~

It was dark when she woke.

A small frown flitted across her face before her eyes opened. Where was she? As soon as her eyes opened though she smiled. The chest under her cheek was Sheldon's. It was softer than she had expected.

Of course, she had always though he would feel like Mr. Bojangles from the science lab at her high-school back in Omaha. Who could blame her? The guy was almost freakishly thin. He smelled really good too.

The man underneath her shifted awkwardly, and she pulled herself into an upright position. "Sorry Sheldon, I fell asleep!"

"I'm aware." He noted, pressing a button on the remote.

A quick glance at the screen informed her that not only was the movie over, but most of the special effects were as well. She yawned and raised her arms above her head in a stretch. "Wow, I guess I should be going huh?"

The movement made Sheldon's pajama top rise up to her ribcage.

"What time do you have to be at work tomorrow?" He asked, forcing his eyes away.

She stood and stretched her arm out across her chest and pulled it to her, and then did the same to the other. "Don't have to work till Sunday. They cut my hours those bastards!"

"In that case, you may as well stay here." He stood up brusquely. "You shouldn't be driving in that thing you call a car at this time of the night, who knows what might happen when the engine quits?"

Penny's left eyebrow rose up dangerously.

Misunderstanding, his cheeks flushed. "You don't need to look at me like that, I have a spare bedroom."

It took a few seconds for her to clue in to what he thought she had been thinking, and then she couldn't help but smile. That he had even gone there in his mind was a bit of a shock. He must have been thinking some good thoughts when she was passed out on his shoulder.

Wiping her mouth discretely, hoping she hadn't drooled on him, she shrugged and the nodded. "Ok."

Then she tilted her head and widened her eyes innocently. "So where will I sleep?"


	5. Chapter 5

CH

She snuggled under the comforter and stared up at the shadows the trees outside were casting on the ceiling, a muted display of nature twitching restlessly. Across the hall she could hear Sheldon in his room, changing into his pajamas, putting his comic back alphabetically in order. The guy had a whole house and he still kept his comics in his room. She wondered what he would think of the boxes of Nancy Drew books from her childhood that were under her bed. She'd always meant to get a shelf for them, and put them in order (sequentially) but had never got around to it, and recently had been thinking maybe she was too old for a shelf of Nancy Drew's.

If she has a place like this, she would put up a shelf. She'd put a chair right by it too. Maybe not a bean bag chair like she'd had back in Omaha, probably one of those Queen Anne ones, with a little foot stool. A nice reading lamp would be good too.

A whole bookcase full of books. Even if all she ever did was sit and look at them. Penny smiled, and her eyes closed.

~S~

He had never thought that he would own a house, so he'd accustomed himself to having to deal with the habits of others. Apartments, dorms, they were all the same really. Somewhere along the line he had come to expect it. The change had been alarming. The first night, at three in the morning, as he lay listening to the wind and the ticking of the clock downstairs, he'd almost packed it in and headed back to the apartment. What should have been bliss seeming more like loneliness. He couldn't remember the last time he'd truly been alone in a building that wasn't Caltech.

As he crawled into bed, he heard a slight snore from the spare room. Penny had left the door open. He thought about getting up and going to shut it, or his own, but didn't. It was nice to hear someone else. A niggling thought formed in the back of his mind. Maybe he should get a roommate? The house was paid for, so there was no financial need, however the extra funds could buy some new game equipment... The problem, he knew, was that as it was HIS house, he would not take kindly to others coming and going at all hours of the night. There would be strict rules, and people un-aquantied with him would balk and demand tiresome explanations. He could of course, invite Leonard, but he was rather tired of Leonard and all his girlfriends. Raj would be a wonderful roommate, but he already had an apartment and then his sister would have to stay with them, which would be one more person than was preferred.

A glance at the clock beside his bed told him it was time to stop thinking and start sleeping, so he closed his eyes and drifted off.

~P~

The sound of a pot banging in the kitchen caused her to open her eyes. The room was flooded with sunlight, and there was the smell of breakfast in the air. She could get used to this, she thought, swinging her feet out of the bed and standing up with a stretch.

In the kitchen, she found two plates on the table, and Sheldon at the stove.

"It's almost ready." He said over his shoulder. "It's pancake day."

"Mmm, I love pancakes." Penny smiled, sitting down. "Have been out to that little farm store in east LA? They sell the best syrup."

"It's a pancake store?" He turned around fully, still clad in his pajamas.

"Sort of, they sell cookies and fudge and farm fresh ice cream that sort of thing too."

His head tilted to a forty-five degree angle. "Interesting." He brought over a plate of steaming pancakes and sat down across from her, putting the plate in the middle.

She helped herself to a pancake and grinned. "I'll have to take you one day."

Sheldon ate slowly, carefully cutting up his pancake before spearing a piece and eating it. "Penny, how is your financial situation currently?" He asked suddenly.

"Well, I probably shouldn't have bid on those dresses worn by Cheryl Cole on ebay." Penny made a sour face. "Why?"

He chewed another piece of pancake. "Would you be opposed to being my new roommate?"


	6. Chapter 6

CH

Never in a million years had Penny ever thought that she would end up being Sheldon's roommate. Maybe it was the pancake fumes, or maybe it was the idea of having a yard to tan in and a cute little house to come home to every night, but she'd yes.

She now had the bedroom with the shelves and the chair and her books set up like she'd always wanted. He'd even helped her move- complete with diagrams and organizational sheets. The guys had been in a bit of shock to say the least, but the landlord was more than happy to let her out of her apartment lease early, seeing as she was finally all paid up in back rent.

And so, not even two weeks after first stepping foot on Sheldon's front lawn, Penny found herself with a laundry room she only had to share with one other person.

She'd also rediscovered her love of baking. Living by herself, she almost never baked, eating a whole batch of cookies by yourself lost its appeal after a while. Here though, she had discovered by accident, if you baked something and left it on the counter to cool, it disappeared. So with delight, she pulled out her old cookbook, and took over the kitchen.

So far, Sheldon had consumed peanut butter cookies, lemon meringue pie, butter tarts and cinnamon buns. Penny sometimes wondered if Sheldon even realized he was eating, but then he'd make a comment about how nice it was to be able to have butter in the baking without feeling guilty and she'd laugh. It was true, while she was dating Leonard, she'd wondered if she'd ever be able to make her special homemade pudding again.

So she was making it tonight. She'd bought a nice tablecloth for their table and had it set, there was spaghetti with little hot dogs cut up in it simmering on the stove, and garlic bread in the oven. Sheldon was making a salad, insuring that each piece of lettuce had been washed to his specifications and the cucumbers and peppers where cut precisely right.

There was a bottle of wine open on the counter, but she'd only sipped at it, she'd practically given up drinking now that she had someone at home to talk to, or at least hear around the house. She didn't feel lonely every night now so her partying had been cut back too. Best of all, since she now paid half the wi-fi bill, she never needed to learn the new password, she got to choose it!

She pulled the spaghetti off the stove and brought it to the table, sitting down happily.

~S~

He had to admit it was going well. Penny was surprisingly good at giving him his space, and he was quite pleased with the influx of home made cookies and desserts that had accompanied her arrival. He was even almost getting used to the site of Penny curled up in his couch, watching a movie with his binary code blanket pulled over her.

His bathroom schedule remained uninterrupted, thanks to there being two bathrooms, and they had so far managed to do laundry without fighting over the machine.

The nights when Penny worked late, he was often treated to left over cheesecake, and he thought it possible he may have gained a pound which would please his mother. The ability to walk to work would keep him from gaining too many he knew, and having to mow his lawn any time it grew more than two inches tall.

They took turns dialling the phone for delivery, and shared cooking duties on the weekend along with household chores. Altogether it could be much worse.

Tonight she was making pudding for dessert.

He'd turned down a guys trip to the solar conservatory to stay home and enjoy it.


	7. Chapter 7

CH7

His new lawn mower purred under his hands. He'd researched his purchase of course, and while the electric ones were surely better for the environment, he'd chosen a gas powered model both for the horsepower and the ease of being cord-free. As he didn't own a car, he considered it an allowable offence.

Now, in his lawn mowing pants, he strode along behind the machine, pushing it up and down the back yard in careful lines. It brought back memories of mowing his mee-maws lawn for pocket money, and humid Texas nights watching the thunder roll in with a frosty glass of iced tea.

It was hot here too. He turned off the lawn mower and pulled off his shirts, tucking them into the back of his pants as he had as a youth. He had anticipated this necessity, and so was wearing one of his paintball undershirts underneath. Without another thought, he leaned down and started the mower again, resuming his job.

~P~

It was hot. Gloriously hot. Bright, sunny, and beautiful weather had descended upon Pasadena for the summer. As she pulled in the driveway, Penny gave a sigh of relief.

What a wonderful feeling to be able to park and not worry about someone's doors slamming into the bodywork or backing into the bumper and taking off without leaving insurance details. Not that her car was worth all that much, or even in that great of shape, but it was great to have a real space to park. A driveway.

As she popped the trunk and started pulling out grocery bags, she could hear the lawn mower going in the backyard. He'd said he needed to mow the lawn today. By the looks of it, the front was already done. Horizontal lines this time. Last week had been vertical.

With a twist of her lips, she wondered what next week would bring. Diagonals maybe? Pushing through the front door she placed the bags on the counter, then turned to go back for more. Two people ate a lot more than one did, especially when one was Sheldon, and he now got to eat two spring rolls instead of just one. With Howard spending most evenings eating with Bernadette, and Raj eating with his sister and Leonard, there was just the two of them most nights. Unless Priya was cooking Indian food, that is.

She paused to look out the window to the backyard, and froze. He was mowing the lawn in an undershirt and a pair of faded jeans that hung lightly off his hips, though probably not as much as they would have last month, due to increased diet. His ipod was tucked in a front pocket, the cord winding it's way up his chest before dividing to go to his ears, his eyes ever intent on following the preceding line exactly.

He looked hot. Alarmingly attractive too. Penny pursed her lips. After she brought in the rest of the groceries, she'd take a pitcher of lemonade out to him and they could sit on the deck in their new lawn chairs. Then she'd fire up the barbeque and they'd have the potato salad she'd bought and some nice steaks. Maybe some baked potatoes with butter too, she mused, hurrying a bit. He was nearly done, she wanted to get out there before he put those shirts back on.


	8. Chapter 8

CH8

It was the water fight of the century. Penny grinned as she knelt in front of her open bedroom window, waiting for the verbal cue to unleash a garbage bin full of water on the unsuspecting below. When Sheldon had commented that his favourite thing as a child was planning the yearly family water fight against his cousins, she had had a feeling that it had always been an elaborate affair. Being one to love elaborate anything, she'd convinced him to plan another one. The two of them, Bernadette and Amy against Raj, Priya, Leonard and Howard.

The first assault had been victorious, water pistols from behind the immaculate hydrangea bushes as their opponents stepped out of the car. When Sheldon had gone to reload his and Penny's retro Super Soaker CPS 3200s disaster had struck in the form of water balloons from the enemies trunk.

Amy and Bernadette quickly retreated to their second station, unleashing their own barrage along with deathly war cries which Amy had assured them would strike terror in the hearts of their opponents. Personally, Penny thought that the sight of them in full battle gear with war paint and everything was probably enough to do that.

She had enjoyed painting up everyone with her stage makeup. The feeling of Sheldon's face underneath her fingertips was a bit disconcerting, he had such clear skin, and it was so soft... His eyes were so blue against the blacking that she had carefully traced under his eyes, and he had seemed to enjoy the feeling of her hands on his skin...

Lost in thought, she nearly missed the first cue, but just in time she upended the huge green bin through the window with a war cry that nearly masked the squeals of shock from below.

"A hit! A capital hit!"

~S~

The sight of Leonard and Priya being doused in a cascade of water from above was satisfying on so many levels, and from his vantage point, Sheldon grinned widely. He watched as Penny leaned out of her window and signalled to Bernadette who then catapulted several water balloons at the already drenched couple with uncontainable glee. Raj walked around the corner of the house just in time to get a water balloon straight in the chest, and as he looked down in shock Amy turned on the hose from where she was hidden under the deck.

His plan was being executed perfectly. Unlike the Physics Department Paintball team, this group was motivated and eager to win, and displayed a slightly terrifying viciousness. Penny in particular was acting rather Lara Croft today, and he had to admit it brought out the primitive male in him when she tossed him a victorious grin from her spot at the window before disappearing.

He had noticed a slight shift in himself towards the barbaric recently. Amy had dismissed it as a form of nesting- he the alpha male of his group, feeling protective of his house and the woman who resided within it. While she was indisputably the expert in brain function, he was unprepared to admit the cause was so simple. While Penny was a woman certainly, and she did live in his house, she was not his woman.

Amy had countered with a simple question. Did he want her to be?

The thought was vaguely terrifying. He would think about it later. Right now it was time to lay siege to Howard.


	9. Chapter 9

Ch9

One month. Just one month, and everything had changed. She was getting better tips at work, because she smiled more. She was sleeping better, drinking less, and going for daily jogs around the university campus because it was there, and her agent said she was glowing. Sheldon had snorted at that, but commented that her cheeks had more colour to them, a remark that was repeated by a casting agent at one of her auditions. She'd gotten the part, a walk on role on a popular tv series, and managed to turn it into a repeating character. Sheldon had hugged her, (or rather not frozen completly when she launched herself at him) when she had told him the good news, and gone over the contract himself to ensure she was being paid correctly.

It didn't pay much of course, certainly not enough to quit the restaurant, but every little bit helped. They now had super high speed internet for instance.

Penny grinned, staring down at the laptop which Sheldon had given her ages ago. Super fast internet. Excellent for winning bids on ebay. Even better for watching behind the scenes footage of her favourite actors shooting a skinny dipping scene.

"Are you watching naked men again, Penny?"

Eyes wide, she turned the laptop so he couldn't see the screen. "It's not a porno, it's behind the scenes footage!"

"What's the difference?" He asked, sitting down beside her and opening his own laptop.

"Well, they aren't having sex for one thing, and their bits are covered." She protested. "Besides, it's only a thirty second long clip."

"Hmm." He mused. "So if I were to take footage of you in the shower and post it on the internet, that would be ok?"

She gave him the death glare.

"Bzinga." He breathe-laughed for a moment.

Smacking him on the shoulder she went back to you tube. "It's not like I'm watching a sex tape Sheldon." She reiterated. "Which I KNOW you've seen at least one, so don't forget that."

"I never forget anything. It was the worst Leia costume I've ever seen." He muttered, tapping away at his keyboard.

Penny shuddered. She never watched sex tapes anymore, not even celeb ones, not since the one that she and Kurt had made had somehow been uploaded on the internet. "I made one once." She confessed suddenly. "When I was living with Kurt. I thought it was forever you know, and it was his birthday... After we split he posted it online, but I made him take it down as soon as I found out."

Sheldon raised an eyebrow at her, then looked resolutely back at his screen. "He didn't take it down."

She froze, turning huge eyes to him. "WHAT?"

He continued typing. "He didn't take it down, it was TAKEN down, by the government, and the tape confiscated and I was informed, destroyed."

"You were informed?" Penny couldn't believe it. Sheldon had seen her sex tape? The government took it down? What on earth was going on? That had been years ago!

Sheldon coughed slightly, she noticed his ears going a bit red and his face assuming the impassive mask that always emerged when he was distancing himself from a touchy conversation. "Yes."

Putting her laptop down on the coffee table, she turned to him with her arms crossed across her chest and a junior rodeo showdown look on her face. "Explain."

He glanced at her and sighed, his shoulders drooping slightly. He knew that look. He put his own laptop down on the table so it wouldn't get wrecked should he have to block any throat punches, and noted that Penny was probably the only person in the world who could look ferocious sitting on a couch where her feet didn't even touch the floor. He remembered briefly his sister at the age of four in a similar position, and amended the previous thought to solely Pasadena, and over the age of six.

Penny sucked on her teeth.

He cleared his throat. "When Missy was in high-school," he began.

"What does this have to do with Missy?"

"Do you want to hear the explanation or not?"

"Fine. Continue."

"When Missy was in high-school, (and I was in Germany working on my second doctorate), one of her boy friends managed to take a picture of her topless and post it online. It was swiftly taken down sue to her being under-aged and the local internet usage being thoroughly monitored since I tried to buy radioactive materials, years earlier."

"And?" Penny motioned with her hand.. "Where do I come in?"

Sheldon looked surprised. "When you moved into the Apartment Building of course. I had to google you to make sure you weren't a foreign spy."

"And the tape popped up?"

"Yes. It took only seconds for me to see what it was, and since I was working on a little side project for the government I informed the agent I was working with that you appeared to be underage. He was also so good as to retrieve my pants."

"I wasn't underage." Penny frowned. "You only watched a few seconds?"

"The time stamp put you at just before your eighteenth birthday." Sheldon said casually.

"What time stamp?"

"The one I digitally added to the opening frame." Sheldon smirked.

Penny started laughing. "You had only just met me Sheldon."

He tilted his head, and turned his gaze towards the window. "You were nice to us, not embarrassed to be seen eating with us, which was amazing as Wolowitz insisted on singing throughout the first meal out. Also you were impressed by my work which showed intelligence on your part." He paused. "I had also promised my sister that I would remain vigilant against online ex-boyfriend wrath. She did not specify it was only her boyfriends."

Penny nodded, and grinned. "Well, thank you. You're like my own super hero now. That tape could have really wrecked my career."

He inclined his head. "May I get back to work now?"

"Sure." Penny jumped up. "I'll go make popcorn."

Sheldon picked up his laptop and resumed working.

Super Hero. Next to Beautiful Mind, it was the second nicest thing anyone had ever said about him. Except perhaps for Evil Genius...


	10. Chapter 10

CH10

Disaster. Chaos. _Of all the things..._

Sheldon sighed as he hung up the phone. Penny was staring at him, her eyebrows raised Spock-style, he could feel it. It made all the hairs on the back of his neck stand to attention, a not altogether unpleasant feeling when it was coming from Penny. It was decidedly irritating from anyone else though and down right spooky from strangers.

"My mother." He announced to the air in front of him.

"Ah." Penny replied sagely from the doorway to the kitchen. "Do I detect motherly meddling from somewhere in Texas?"

"Worse." He replied morosely. He had been astounded to learn that all mothers acted like his, Penny's in particular. It had made the realization that there really was only one Beverly Hofstader in the world very depressing. Not that she was one of a kind, but that Leonard had somehow warranted her as a mother, when he himself would have been much suited. Except for that whole Not-allowing-skipping-ahead thing. Imagine taking four or five years to do high-school. He shuddered again.

"Can't be that bad." Penny called from where she had returned to mixing batter for banana muffins. "You haven't hit your head on anything yet."

Penny had introduced him to her "mom-o-meter" scale of interfering. She had one for Dad's too he knew, but she hadn't yet shared it with him. Hitting your head against something- ie a wall or door, ranked at a seven. A full out scream ranked a ten.

"I am still decided how to rate it." He crossed his arms over his chest jerkily. "My mother is coming to visit me."

There was the sound of a spoon hitting the floor in the kitchen, and then a curse.

Sheldon got up and walked over to the doorway, peeking in. Penny was washing the spoon she had just dropped. "Did you hear me?"

"Yes. Your Born-Again-Christian Mother who cooks with lard is coming to visit you. Us." She turned to look at him. "When?"

There was a slight tone of panic in her voice.

He tilted his head. "Tomorrow."

"_TOMORROW?_"

"Yes. You see the dilemma. Is this worth possibly damaging my frontal lobe or the wall, or is more of a Ben and Jerry's Chocolate Mint experience?"

Penny sucked on her teeth and stared at him while she thought. The house was clean. They had set up the third bedroom as a spare with the rest of Penny's furniture. He had cleaned out and bleached the fridge and freezer just the other day, so really...

She opened the silverware drawer and handed him two spoons. "Ben and Jerry's it is. Wouldn't want to damage the walls before your mother sees them." She grinned tightly.

"She doesn't believe me you know." He said, opening the tub of ice cream and setting it in the middle of the table.

"About what?"

"That you live here."

"Well, then I guess she's in for a surprise, isn't she?" Penny quipped.

Sheldon felt his lips twitch into a sinister grin worthy of the Joker himself. Indeed...


	11. Chapter 11

**AN: Thanks so much for the reviews and the patience everyone, I've just got back from a long holiday, and now I'm getting back to writing! Hope you enjoy!**

CH

The first morning went well. Mary Cooper rose at her normal waking hour and once dressed, made her way downstairs to the kitchen, expecting to make breakfast for those still sleeping.

But they weren't. Through the back window, she could clearly see her son and his roommate/friend sitting on the back deck reading through a news paper. He had the Science and Technology, and she the Arts and Entertainment section. Between them on the table was a small pot of tea, two cups filled with the steaming liquid, and a tall tower of what appeared to be french toast.

"Up early this morning are we?" She asked, opening the door.

"No." Her son replied, folding his section closed and laying it on the top of the rest of the newspaper. "We normally arise at this hour on Saturday. We must be on the road by eight to get to the farmers market on time."

"Oh?" Her eyes shifted between the two of them. "You two make a habit of going to the farmers market?"

Sheldon sighed, but before he could open his mouth to launch into a lengthy explanation of his new routines, Penny swallowed the food in her mouth and laid her newspaper down.

"I already told you Sheldon, I can go alone, you and your mom should have a nice visit." Penny smiled at them both.

"You can't go alone!" Sheldon exclaimed, "We need several things Penny, I had anticipated requiring all of our bags and baskets this morning."

Mary Cooper sat down between them and began helping herself to the french toast, which was her favourite. "We could all go." She suggested. The prospect of seeing her son willingly heading to a farmers market was intriguing, and if this was the way God was seeing fit to make him a normal human being than so be it. She would have to let her prayer circle know.

Sheldon eyed his mother suspiciously. "Fine. But I get to choose the vegetables."

His mother nodded slightly. "I understand."

"Good." He beamed, helping himself to more french toast. "We leave in half an hour so eat up."

His mother eyed him as she ate. He was looking better, his frame filled out slightly. Still thinner than a coat rack of course, but at least now it was a coat rack with coats on it. His cheeks had a bit more colour to them, and his eyes sparkled, enhanced by the blue shirt he was wearing on top of the orange one, sleeves as ever pushed to the elbows.

Penny was looking good too, she noticed. Hair pulled back in a simple pony tail, less make-up, she was a bit thinner but it looked more like she had simply converted certain soft spots into muscle, rather than dieting. Indeed, her appetite seemed good, and she was glowing with good health.

The yard was immaculate, as was the house, lived in of course, but tidy. Perhaps she hadn't needed to rush down here after all. God was taking care of things, forgive her for doubting. The news that Sheldon had purchased a house and moved out of his apartment, and that Penny -the caregiver- had moved in with him had her imagining the worst. She'd come prepared to coax him back to sanity, and give Penny's ministrations the motherly backup that had always been required before.

Leonard had apparently allowed her to think the worst. Perhaps he didn't know. She'd seen no signs of Leonard on her tour through the previous evening upon her arrival. A small question had given her the knowledge that Sheldon and Penny didn't see much of the other guys anymore but Raj, except on weekends and the occasional night when neither Howard nor Leonard had dates. Leonard had said something the same, but over the phone and knowing her son she had imagined Sheldon sulking in his house, resisting any other sort of change.

But here he was, tying up the newspaper and putting plates back on the tray, while Penny scooped up te cups and the teapot and made her way inside to begin rinsing the dishes and loading the dishwasher. It was fairly obvious that this was something either did without thinking about it too much.

Mary now began to set her sights a little higher. She wasn't needed to coax him into life, but perhaps... She eyed the way the two worked in harmony. Perhaps, romance? She wandered to the car to wait, pulling out her cell phone. The prayer circle would need to work hard on this one.


	12. Chapter 12

**AN: Sorry for the wait again, hope this makes up for it!**

CH

The faint smell of bleach on the softness of her pillowcase, her body felt warm as she stretched out, feeling her hair slide over her shoulders like a silk chemise. Bliss. She stifled a moan as a hand slide under the sheets, then another, trailing up her calves and the backs of her knees in a gentle, lingering motion. The bed shifted, the weight of another on it, the hands running back down to her feet, massaging, feeling.

Oh god the feeling.

Smoothing upwards, her thighs, her buttocks, pausing to knead the small of her back and then sliding up to brush her hair off her back and then...

A kiss. Feather-light, in between her should blades. Directly on her vertebrae. Or was it vertabra? He'd told her just the other day...

Him. His blue eyes twinkling with self satisfaction that he had been asked to share his knowledge. He loved that.

She liked how he smiled.

Sheldon's smile. Sheldon. A kiss on the shoulder, his hands sliding down to her hips, raising them up, smoothing her thighs, holding her steady...

The most exquisite pleasure. The feeling of him against her, his thighs, behind hers, his hand sliding around to touch her there.

Her chest against the freshly washed sheet, tantalizing, soft, heavy. And then soft words, un ended sentences, building pressure.

She dug her fingernails into the bed and pushed back against him, so deep now, so perfect, the pace faster, arching her back becoming the classic lines of a drawing, swoops and curves and rounded flesh all for him.

Too much. The pleasure.

A half scream, sinking into the mattress, he's with her, still going, groaning now, his weight upon her pushing her down even farther as he shudders and convulses. Collapses. Laughs.

A real laugh.

A deep chuckle. Full of the twang of Texas and the sun through the windows glass.

A banging on the door. Why did she close the door? What time is it?

Oh yes, his mother is here.

She stretches again, taking up the whole bed. Hears the laughter again, and her head shoots up, eyes wide.

A dream, only a dream.

Holy shmoly, the best dream ever.

And what the hell is he laughing at anyways? Her eyes go to the window, the sun on the leaves outside, blue sky. A wonderful day. A shovel scraping on dirt. What on earth?

Her rosebush.

The one he'd lugged home because his mother had said he should buy her some flowers for putting up with him. Because he knew, she preferred her flowers to stay in the garden. They lasted longer that way.

She threw back the covers and jumped out of bed, pulling on a pair of faded shorts and a t-shirt, running her fingers through her hair.

Just another dream, that was all. Didn't mean anything. Just the best dream ever.


	13. Chapter 13

CH

"Sheldon."

"Yes, Leonard?"

"Has it occurred to you," Leonard pushed his glasses up on his nose and peered through them, "that you and Penny have gotten rather, _close_, lately?"

Sheldon paused for a millisecond, then continued scribbling on his white board. "In which way?" He squinted, turned his head slightly, then leaped forward with a final equation which a noise of triumph.

"You do everything together." Leonard sat down on the corner of the desk stirring his cup of soup halfheartedly.

"Not true. Penny goes jogging every morning, and I would never jog."

"Comic con, movies, private dinners..." Leonard ticked off.

"You were also at Comic Con, Penny won two tickets to every new release this summer, and dinner in a restaurant could never be, as you say, private."

"Sheldon, you're dancing around the issue."

"I don't dance." Sheldon murmured, taking a picture of the finished equation and then sitting down to load it into the computer and numerous types of data storage devices. He did dance, of course, when it suited him but the occasion was so rare that it didn't bear mentioning. Last weekend for instance, when Penny had been watching Strictly Come Dancing, ("Dancing with the Stars, only with British accents!" She'd raved) and she'd sighed that she wished she knew how to waltz, he'd explained that it wasn't really that hard as long as you kept the count, and pulled her up for a little demonstration before continuing on to the kitchen to see if there was any pecan pie left.

"Sheldon, what are you thinking of?"

"Pecan pie, why?" Sheldon glanced up at his co-worker in confusion.

"You were smiling."

Sheldon shrugged. "I like pecan pie."

"Who made the pie?" Leonard persisted.

"Penny."

"You never invited _us _over for pecan pie."

"Of course not. Then I'd have to share it. I already said, _I like pecan pie. _Honestly Leonard, this is why you are only a experimental physicist."

"I'm a experimental physicist because that is what I chose to be, not because I.." Leonard paused. "Oh well done. You _have_ been learning from Penny."

"She has a depth of knowledge about social interaction that is staggering, and I would be remiss as to not take advantage of the chance to expand my abilities in an area which is not offered as a university course." Sheldon agreed. "Now, I ask that you leave."

Leonard frowned. "Why?"

"Because I have just solved that problem I have been working on for months, and I have to type up my notes and report, so that I can go celebrate with Penny."


	14. Chapter 14

CH

"So," Penny said, as soon as the tux clad waiter at the ritzy french eatery left them alone, "this discovery that we are celebrating in high style, is it Noble Prize worthy?"

Sheldon breathed out a laugh and discretely checked that the napkin was freshly laundered before placing it in his lap and turning his attention to the silver. He'd vetted this place every year in anticipation of one day holding a Noble Prize reception there, but it didn't hurt to make sure they were keeping up their standards all the same. Satisfied that the silver was immaculate he smiled brightly at Penny. "No, unless it's a very slow year in the field of science. It is however of great importance."

Penny watched him as the waiter came back and went through the wine ritual before departing again. Sheldon was vibrating with excitement. "Have you proved String Theory?" She guessed.

"No." Sheldon leaned in and said in a hushed voice. "But almost as good." He paused for dramatic effect, "I have _disproved _loop theory!"

"You've made the Winkle girl redundant?"

"Well," Sheldon thought for a minute, "I suppose so, but she's a bright enough girl, now that she can't waste her time on the wrong model of the universe, who knows what she might achieve." He declared magnanimously. "The possibilities are endless, the dimensions of life as we know it..."

She interrupted him by putting her hand on his arm briefly and then raising her glass. "Here is saying goodbye to loop theory and all of the hokum that goes with it!"

He smiled and raised his glass of sparkling water with spirit. "Yes!"

Their glasses clinked, and they watched each other over the rims of their cups as they drank before turning to the waiter, who was once again there with brown leather menus. They ordered, and then settled down to enjoy the meal.

"Your mother phoned today." Penny mentioned, "She was clearing out the attic and wondered if you wanted her to keep your christening dress, your little league participation medal, your death ray, or your mind control helmet."

"Yes."

"To which?"

"All of it. I suppose she could just send it here, we've got an attic too you know."

"So you intend on having children one day then?" Penny quizzed.

"Progeny, yes." Sheldon nodded quickly. "My life's work will not amount to much if there is no one to continue it."

"Sheldon, you can't predict that your children will be as smart as you, or if they are, what they are going to want to study." She pointed out, stabbing the air with her fork for emphasis.

He frowned and cut into his steak. "By my calculations, if I have between four and six offspring, at least two will have some aspect of my intelligence, and if I start them when they are young, one will grow up to consider theoretical physics the perfect spot for their mind."

"Four to six! You're going to have that many kids?"

"Well, if the first two are geniuses than there is no point in having more, although the prospect of having a whole paintball team of geniuses does appeal." His eyes raised to hers again. "Don't you want kids Penny?"

"Well yes," She stammered. "I had always thought maybe three, I like kids. But Sheldon, what if none of them inherit your brains?"

He scowled. "They will."

Penny shook her head and laughed suddenly. Here they were, discussing kids like an old married couple. He was probably right, his kids would be smart even if they only inherited half his mental ability, and good looking too, with huge blue eyes and silky brown hair and impish smiles...

Sheldon looked up to see what Penny was laughing at and caught her gaze on him, her green eyes sparkling and her cheeks slightly flushed. "What?"

"I was just thinking that you're right. You should have lots of offspring, the world is going to need all the help it can get." She smiled gently, still imagining a line up of mini-Sheldons.

"Exactly." Sheldon nodded. " I'm glad you brought this up Penny, you realise you are 27 now."

"So?" She frowned, the minis vanishing.

"With approximately two years between children, we have less than a year to make arrangements."

"What do you mean, less than a year? Lots of women over 40 conceive!"

"Women over 40 have a 5 % percent chance of conceiving, even with IVF." He corrected, "And as you already stated, my mother would not be thrilled with a lab fertilization."

"Don't you think you're skipping some steps?" Penny went back to the original statement.

"Leonard says we are practically dating already, and my mother likes you." He blinked at her. "What else is there?"

Pleased that his mother liked her, Penny had to think for a minute to recall her initial objection. "We aren't dating though, we haven't had sex, we aren't married, and... Do you really want _me_ to be the mother of your children?"

"Penny," he replied dryly, "You're the only woman I'm not related to that I can bear to have touch me, except Amy, and she is engaged to a sheik, and lacking in the necessary attributes to be a good mother for my children."

"Ah.." Penny smiled knowingly. "This is about the Pecan pie, isn't it?"

"Of course." He bent over his food again.

"A year huh?"

"Yes, approximately."

"You do realize what goes into the making of children, right?" Penny's eyebrows had risen again.

"Of course. Are you accepting?"

Penny blinked. _He was serious?_ "Can I think about it?"

"I can allow you six weeks to think about it, I have scheduled the courting to begin as late as Halloween."

"Thank you." _Six weeks to contemplate spending the rest of her life with Sheldon? Her bed? A life time of immaculate bathrooms and pristine sheets ironed by long slim hands, of watching big blue eyes over the morning coffee?_

"Penny?"

"Yes?"

"I think you would be a wonderful mother."


	15. Chapter 15

CH

Batman, The Penguin, Joker, Riddler, the delectably devious horticulturalist Poison Ivy, Two-face, and then last but not least, Scarecrow. It had taken her all day, but she had done it. Before her was the complete mini action figure set as envisioned by Ronald McDonald, collected from 15 different McD's locations in the LA area. Now, to put on the candles and Sheldon's cake would be perfect. Thank god McDonald's sold toys separately or she'd have gained twenty pounds on happy meals.

Penny sighed, and stepped back to admire her handy work. When he had put a ban on birthday gifts he hadn't said anything about cake.

Things had been slightly awkward since his roundabout proposal of dating, marriage, and a life time of child-raising.

He hadn't seemed to notice anything different, all the awkwardness was in her mind but still... She'd spent the last few weeks going over the pros and cons, every possible outcome imaginable. She'd peppered him with questions about intimacy and family medical history and baby name preferences. Every little detail had gone under her microscope with a ruthlessness that she usually reserved for haggling over the price of knock-off shoes, because this was the rest of her life she was looking at after all.

Sure, she wanted kids, and they did live well together, which was something.

She'd always thought that she'd be madly in love when she got married though. And it wasn't that she didn't love Sheldon, because she knew she did, she just wasn't sure if it had the potential to be _that _kind of love, and with Sheldon, you had to be sure. He'd never recover if she changed her mind halfway along the line. There was chemistry though, and the man was better at commitment than any other on the planet excepting Buddhist monks, and definitely he was attractive, but he was kind of bat crap crazy.

She walked over to the sink and rested her arms on the edge, looking out the window at the backyard they had tended together all summer long.

Sheldon was in the far corner of the yard with Howard and Raj building a shed with laser like precision, double checking each measurement and screw placement like he was building a rocket to outer space, a tool belt full of machinery hanging off his hips and a blue print pencil tucked behind his ear. Every so often he would say something to Howard and the short man would start waving his arms around and pacing back and forth while Raj tried to sooth them both. No doubt it was some comment on Howard's lack of doctorate. The shed really did look like a space ship though.

Penny raised an eyebrow and leaned closer to the window. Maybe it was? You never knew with Sheldon.

She'd had an uncle like that, and as a kid he was her favourite relative next to Gran. You never knew what he'd do next, but you always knew where you stood with him. Not a bad quality to have. Her mom had always laughed when she went running out of the house to see what uncle Paul was doing now, and said that they were two peas in a pod, heads full of dreams and toes deep underground. It had always made a shiver of happiness go through her when she had heard that, because if her Dad was her hero, Uncle Paul was her Idol. Her lips curled into a smile with the memory.

Maybe there was just enough crazy in her blood stream to make this work after all.


	16. Chapter 16

CH

"So how do we this?" She asked, leaning over the counter, watching him have another slice of cake. The shed/rocket was built, the troops had been fed, and once again the little house was silent except for the two of them.

"I suppose I should ask you out on a date."

"That's it? But we've done all those things already." Penny pointed out.

Sheldon put down his fork thoughtfully. "Well, if this was two hundred years ago, which it isn't, I would ask to make your acquaintance, arrange to 'run into' you at various events until such a time as I was welcome to pay a visit to your abode and formerly request your hand in marriage from your father. Unless of course, you established by the code of the fan that you were not interested, or rebuffed my cleverly coded bouquets of flowers."

Penny pursed her lips. "Would you have tried to sneak a kiss in the moonlight?"

His eyebrows twitched. "Would you have been receptive to such a thing?"

"Well, you do waltz divinely."

"I see. You do know that the waltz was a risque form of dance not acceptable for respectable young females of a certain class at that time?" He quizzed.

Penny burst out laughing. "Would that have stopped you?"

His lips curled up at the edges. "Social protocol has never stopped me before."

She rose up and walked around the counter, touching his chin gently with her hand. "And that is one of the things I love about you." She winked and quickly kissed him on the cheek then left the room, climbing the stairs.

He sat there, frozen for a moment, before a smile took over his face.

When she had informed him over supper that she was accepting his proposition, he had instantly envisioned a line of mini geniuses coming down the stairs in full paintball equipment, with Penny bringing up the rear, issuing commands and plans of attack. They would be formidable, unbeatable. Penny had aged gracefully of course, her long blond hair tied back in a braid, her camouflage tank top clinging invitingly to the curves childbearing had emphasized. He would be similarly dressed, greying perhaps, but not bald- nobody in his family ever went bald, and he would pat his Nobel Prize lovingly before going out the door to take on the Last Chance Paintball Park. All of the children would have inherited Penny's athletic prowess, except the youngest, who would be the smartest, and who would grip his hand tightly as they ran through the tire park cleared by the older siblings... The fact that this youngest child had big green eyes and a long blonde ponytail surprised him enough that he had been able to blink away the vision and cut his cake before Howard started singing about monkeys.

What monkeys had to do with birthdays, he'd never know.

He hadn't really considered the fact that the children would also share Penny's looks, not just her abilities, perhaps some to the extent of being mini-hers. Pressing his hand to the kiss which was still tingling on his cheek, he found the idea irresistible. He'd never before met someone so attractive and simultaneously so good at video games, what would the world do if they produced a female so attractive, and with brains to rival his...

She could work for the government. The next Mata Hari. A live Queen Amadala. He stood up suddenly. The next leader of the Nobel Prize Award Committee!

His fingers fumbled with excitement as he moved his plate and fork to the sink, rinsing them carefully before putting them into the dishwasher, and turning off the light.

There was much to be done. Much to be learned.

He had planned on a extended courtship of dinners out, followed by movies in, but she was right, and they had been doing that all summer. He was now officially a boyfriend.

He needed to find out what that entailed. He would have to ask Penny. Slowly he climbed the stairs.

Penny sat on the edge of her bed, running a brush through her long hair. It had grown another four inches since she had moved into the house. It hadn't been this long in years. The one time she had mentioned getting a haircut, Sheldon had cut her off so quickly, she hadn't brought it up again. With all that had happened in the last while, she had started to wonder if he had a thing for long blonde hair.

It might be the most normal thing he'd ever done. Lots of men had a special liking of long hair, she'd just never really thought much about it until he had reacted so badly to the suggestion that it needed to be cut.

And she did enjoy the way it felt on her fingers.

One hundred strokes with a boar bristle brush, her mother had drilled it into her conscious. Fifty on top, and fifty upside down, to let the blood rush to the scalp. Healthy hair was beautiful hair. Her mothers one vanity.

A worthy one, she thought, because it was true her mother had had beautiful hair. Longer than Penny's, even now, and a lighter shade of blonde courtesy of her Norse ancestors.

She was even pretty sure there was a song about long hair.

It wasn't long before she heard Sheldon's footsteps coming up the stairs, and then a silence which meant he had paused. Looking up, she saw him standing in the doorway to her room, watching her slide the brush through her hair.

"Yes?" She smiled at him.

"I just thought..." He blinked, eyes mesmerized on the trajectory of her brush strokes, "what does a boyfriend do?"

"Well," Penny stood up and moved over to him. "Usually, they give their girlfriend a kiss before bed."

"Ah, the good night kiss, I read about that." He frowned.

"I just brushed my teeth." Penny notified him seriously.

His eyes slide over her, and one of his long fingers reached out to touch the length of hair cascading over her shoulder. She rarely wore it down like this.

Suddenly, with hawk like accuracy, he swooped in and planted a quick kiss on her lips.

"No." Penny shook her head, "Like this."

He had to admit her was much more enjoyable.


	17. Chapter 17

CH

It turns out it is fairly easy to be a boyfriend. He is not sure in fact why Leonard and Howard seem to find it so bewildering. He makes sure to complement Penny when he finds her attractive, allows her to hold his arm when they go out for dinner and to hold hands with her in the movie theatre. Having lived with her for a few months with no ill effects, he supposes that his cornhusker antibodies have multiplied to such extent that he is immune to her.

Her germs at least.

The more that she touches him, smiles at him, and wears her hair down, he finds his resistance to her physical attractiveness fading. Where before he could look at her in tiny denim shorts and be satisfied with the thought that she looks good, now he has to fight to not touch her and see what those silky smooth legs feel like. All scientists require data, but before it was enough to know, now he wants to experience.

It's making him rather more twitchy than usual.

So when she walks into his office and sits down on the desk in front of him, he doesn't hiss that she is sitting on a months worth of data scribbles, or that desks are not made for sitting on, he just stares wide eyed and shoves his hands under his legs to hold them down.

The shorts are shorter than usual, her skin more luminescent, and he could swear she has scented her legs with coconuts. His tongue flicks out to run over his bottom lip, and he simultaneously wonders if her legs taste like coconut too, and what on earth she wants.

But she is telling him what she wants. She is asking him why he has been so twitchy, and hiding away in here.

He is having trouble paying attention, his eyes are on her legs, the hem of those short shorts, the ribbon of silky blonde hair that has fallen over one shoulder and down her chest to hang in front of her stomach, six inches from his nose.

He breathes in Kiwis.

His mind supplies the image of the shampoo he noticed in the shower yesterday, the one that he couldn't resist sniffing.

Her hand is on his chin and he drags his eyes back to hers slowly.

"Your pupils are dilated." She comments with a smile.

He stands up suddenly so she can't see his pupils so well, but there isn't as much blood in his head as there usually is, so he finds himself stumbling against the desk and reaches out to steady himself.

His hands are on her legs. Her bare, coconut scented, legs.

He freezes, and sucks in his breath on a shocked note, but his fingers aren't paying attention. _Soft_, they note._ Smooth_. _Warm_. _Very warm._

They slide a bit, up, and then Penny is laughing and her hands are on his, guiding them. "So that is what the problem is... Sheldon, it's okay to touch me. You are my boyfriend, and I think I will enjoy it. It's just another form of kissing." She explains in a low voice, guiding his hands to her hips and then reaching up to pull his head down so she can look in his eyes.

_Kissing_. Yes, he does enjoy that...

He swallows, and she presses a gentle kiss to his closed lips, whispering words against his mouth. "Touch me...Please."

His forehead rests against hers, and his eyes flutter shut, his breathing slows. His fingers begin to wander, collecting data.

Some places are warm. There are hard places and soft places, and places that make Penny moan. He is exploring her body with his fingertips like a blind person reading Braille, and he finds that he can read Penny better like this, with his eyes closed.

She is laying back across his desk now, with her legs still on either side of him, resting on her elbows, just watching him, and feeling.

_Enjoying_.

His fingers are really quite good.

And then one goes where it hasn't before, and she falls back with a thump and a groan, and by touch he knows that she is not filled with revulsion or fear but that she _likes_ where his fingers are going.

Wet, hot, places.

His eyes open, and he can't really believe what he is doing, but he can see it, so it must be true, and see also that her eyes are half closed in pleasure, her hands clenching in restraint.

She wants to touch him too.

He leans over her to give her a kiss, as he can't think what else to do, and then her legs wrap around him, forcing his fingers deeper, and the moan is louder. Her lips on his, moving, her hands gripping his shoulders and the back of his neck, her body moving against his.

He pulls his hands away only to take off the shorts his fingers have slipped up, because it is uncomfortable to move his wrist at that angle, and suddenly he wants to be comfortable. She seems to want to be comfortable to, because she is pulling off her shirt, and his, and twisting her hips to get her shorts off faster. Once his fingers return to the spot that she likes, her hands slow, and slide down his chest, reaching for the button on his pants.

They _are_ feeling more tight than usual, so he kicks them off.

She lets him discover until she can't bear it any longer, and cries out for more. He is confused, until she shows him with what he can go deeper, and it's vaguely shocking, because he had not anticipated this until after they are married, or that it would feel so good, but with her hand on him, any objections his brain half offers fly right out his ears.

Her hand on him feels so much better than when he does it. He supposes that it must be the softness of her palm, her shorter fingers, or the unpredictability of not knowing the next move, but his body doesn't want to think that much, and she is sitting up and pulling something from his drawer.

_Why must Wolowitz fill his drawers with condoms when he is not looking? He knows very well that they will not be used... Except, oh, what is she..._

She has slid it on him and pulled him into her, and his eyes flare open, his jaw drops, and a most unearthly sound fills the room.

He has never thought that his first time will be on his desk.

But then it _is_ where he does his best learning...


	18. Chapter 18

**AN: Happy Belated Birthday to Vicky! Sorry I missed it- teaches me not to check my email! LOL. **

CH

She has to admit, for a first time- it wasn't too shabby. The desk was a bit harder than a bed, but once she moved his Dr. Who ten sonic screwdriver from between her shoulder blades it was kind of amazing how she seemed surrounded by hardness and could feel every change of motion, amplified.

The moment he shoved the paperwork off the desk and joined her on it was the start of something even more wonderful. Yes, she liked him, wanted him, adored him and loved him... But the moment he lost control and gave into his previously denied primitive needs rocked her to her core. It was all kind of a blur after that...

Till they were done, and he registered that the thud from a moment previously was his Tardis hitting the carpeted floor.

He'd peeked over the edge of the desk, and commented that it wasn't broken. He'd scrambled off the desk and picked it up, looking around curiously at the meyhem that surrounded him. She was just sliding off the desk, as he settled the Tardis in it's proper place.

"I do believe your rear is imprinted on my blotter." He'd commented vaguely.

"Hmm, I think you're fingerprints are imprinted on my _ass."_ She'd replied.

Now, up in her room, her face buried in her pillow to hide her serious case of the giggles, she could not believe she'd said that.

That he'd said that.

That they had _done _that. His DESK of all places.

He hadn't even got dressed again. Just picked up the papers and put them back on the desk, gathered his clothes, and headed up the stairs, asking her if there was any leftovers in the fridge because he was feeling rather more hungry than usual.

It didn't seem to have sunk in.

She wondered if tomorrow would be a light or heavy bran day. Just how would this new aspect to their relationship, _to him_, affect his mind?

He was in the shower now. She thought about joining him, just walking in and pulling back the curtain and sliding right in behind him, running her hands over the expanse of his naked and soap sudsy back, pressing herself against him and letting her hands wrap around his front and slide...

God, she had it bad. Not even twenty minutes later and she wanted him to lose control again.

Better to not freak him out too bad, she reasoned. Better to let him get some normal back.

The water turned off, and she wrapped her robe around her tighter and grabbed her towel. He'd probably feel better if she had a shower too. It would spare her a possible lecture at least. Opening the door she peered out.

"My turn?" She asked.

He blinked at her sleepily and nodded, walking into his room.

"Sheldon? You ok?" She went to his door instead of the bathroom.

He was pulling a fresh pair of socks out of his drawer, and looked distracted.

"Sheldon?" She repeated, starting to worry.

"It still says soup." He shook his head ruefully. "Have you thought about having the chinese symbol for crackers done on the other side?"

She blinked and pretended to glare but ended up grinning. "The only one who is crackers around here is _you_."


	19. Chapter 19

AN:I am sorry this has taken so long, i truly am, life has been busy. I promised to write my dear friend a birthday storey, and i failed, and i have had no inspiration for a christmas storey for her either, so concluding this is the best i can do right now. So happy belated birthday, merry christmas, and hopefully a happy new year, my friend!

/

Sheldon stood at the alter, ramrod straight in his coal black suit, the pants of which he had finally found in the university's lost and found, and dry cleaned twice before wearing. His tie was a garish pink, but he didn't mind, because Penny had promised her underthings were the same colour, and that intrigued him. If they were hot pink, they must be new. Previously, if she had new undergarments, something else new occurred as well. Trying to figure out what she had in store, and probabilities of each possibility being the one, had kept him quiet and occupied for the last week.

Miracle of miracles, it had only taken a week for Penny to organise this wedding. Las Vegas, of course. A white dress with frou frou layers and a whispy veil, which he wasn't to know about, except she was now coming down the isle, and looking suspiciously virginal for someone wearing hot pink panties.

Her brother couldn't come, being on parole, but her parents were here, and his brother stood at his side, twitching uncomfortably. he could see his mother dabbing at her eyes and signing her life savings away to the church as she had promised. He had purseuded her to keep it till she was dead though, at least, with the argument that she would need some funds to come and visit her future grandchildren.

His sister was here too, making eyes at Raj, and Howard and Bernadette were on the other side of room, grinning at him oddly. Leonard was sitting with his mother next to them.

As Penny got closer, she lifted up the veil, and from that point on, nobody was there but the two of them.

It had been six months since their first lust fuelled escapade, a deviation from his set plan of courtship, one that he did not regret in the least, and had repeated several times since, with enjoyment. He had felt the need after that to present her with his grandmothers ring, to prove his intentions. She had accepted, and began making plans for summer wedding. But plans had changed.

He had won the Noble Prize. On the heels of that, he had been offered a chance to work at CERN for a year. A year! But the wedding, the progeny production, the yard...

No problem, Penny had announced, she would go too! They could get married early, and rent out the house.

Leonard would move in the day after they left.

He, Sheldon Lee Cooper, Nobel Prize Winner, would be taking his award, his brain, and his wife to Switzerland. The thought made him absolutely giddy.

Until Penny adjusted her bodice, and he caught a glimpse of something hot pink.

"I do." He announced.

Penny grinned, and repeated his words. Elvis smiled at them and snapped closed his book and announced he could now kiss the bride.

And so he did.


End file.
